Dear Witt,
Thanks for sharing your experiences with us.
While I have no idea (and talent) for membership in garage bands
... I do more tinkering in any private "garages" ...
As to your window crank ...
Yes, it is possible that they are bent slightly. You can easily see that, just compare left and right side window crank with each other. The crank's underside is really straight and not bent inwards. Is the door panel straight? Have you renewed the cardboard back? Often this one is heavily rippled due to decades of moisture.
Furthermore, there is a large chrome base between door panel and window crank. Is that still around?
AFAIK the two (three) different window cranks are illustrated somewhere in ouw WIKI. Have you had a look there?
If your window crank is broken, the base missing, etc. it is necessary to contact someone like Dan (Dr. Benz) because both parts are NLA.
Good luck and keep us informed.
Achim
(no SL but parts & knowledge collector)