So on the bed sheet plan, can I just run this past the esteemed readership to see if some of you fellows have really thought this through:
I cut up a perfectly decent set of our silk bedding, hand-woven by Celestial Virgins on ancient looms hewn from the very timbers that formed the ceiling of Noah's cabin, or the Cross. (I assume that's how they are produced; there could be no other rational explanation for why they cost so much).
I then get onto John Lewis (for the Colonials, it's a nice shop in London) and procure a sewing machine for Mrs Howard, that, presumably, I gift at a significant temporal event later this year, whilst suggesting that she also learns how to use the thing.
Within 4-6 months, having - assemedly - managed to talk her out of a divorce for daring to suggest that (a) she learns to sew, (b) giving a sewing machine as a present is actually demonstrative of great endearment, is an extremely romantic gesture, and in no way bears any resemblance whatsoever to the now infamous Magimix-gate of Christmas 2012, and (c) that my car would look better under our sheets than she does, I further assume that I'd be in a position to start work on said project, during which time my car would have been without said - and desired - protection.
Is that really the plan, guys? Really? Are we thinking?
To the others, (except James, whose contribution I don't quite comprehend (James, are you saying that Silver Arrows stole a car cover and hardtop stand on your behalf? Thankfully you know a good lawyer!
)), I'm grateful for the recommendations and will pursue all lines of inquiry.
Separately, if anyone here has an additional, unwanted car cover and would like to swap it for a never used, only thrown once Magimix (2012 model), please do drop me a line. I would imagine we could do a deal.
JH